What is a Tribe?

I recently started reading “A Tribe Called Bliss” by Lori Harder. I have yet to find a better description of what a Tribe is and the characteristics of a tribe. I have felt the benefits of a tribe in my life, but when seeking to explain it to others, my definition has often fell short. This morning in my study I felt the stirring in my heart of the truthfulness of the defining and characteristics Lori shares and I felt it necessary to share with you.

“We turn to different relationships to serve different needs. Some serve more than others, but the point is no one person can completely support another- no matter how much love there is. When we have a tribe we can turn to, we are able to lessen the expectation (and stress) we put on our other relationships.”

Connection is a valuable human need. We all have it. We want to belong to something. It can drive us to move into new spaces and help us see perspectives we may have never seen before. But how do we find those people?


Why do we need people? What benefits come from having a tribe? What are the characteristics of a tribe?

Benefits described from Lori:

  1. Comfort: we can vent, cry, analyze and even yell and cuss with these people without them wanting to just “fix it” or minimize it. They allow you to open up and get that big scary thing out in the open, and they sit with you in it.
  2. Perspective: They provide perspective – being away from the situation they are able to see the situation without being to close to it. They can help us see many roads that may lead to our goal rather than just the one you see currently.
  3. Vulnerability: These people allow you to share without any judgment! They are the ones you can share anything with, and you never feel shame in their presence. They remind you of your worth when you forget and remind you there is no choice that diminishes the value of who you really are inside. (note: be aware guilt and shame are very different.)
  4. Accountability: I was told once – if someone allows you to do something they know you wouldn’t want, but you may have just forgotten for a moment – they are not doing you any favors. These tribe members know your goals and your dreams and they WANT you to succeed. They are checking in with you to ensure you truly are doing what you say you will do and you are tracking to accomplish the goals and dreams you desire. Having said that – you have to share these things with them for them to do this!
  5. Confidence: Your tribe will move you into spaces you have always dreamed to go but never felt brave enough to do on your own. They encourage you and support you and help you see there is so much more in you. They stand by you!

Allowing others in sometimes can be scary, and sometimes ends in hurt. But other times, when a person can build a tribe with the characteristics explained above, connection can cultivate into something far more than one can explain.

If you have opened your heart and been hurt, please don’t close your heart to love. If you have opened your heart and learned the love and light of a true tribe, you know exactly of the love that can be cultivated in the hearts of these relationships.

My desire is to build my tribe, and I pray you can to!

Love and Light Friends!

Spread the word

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